BLAME GAME: A BANE TO HUMAN DEVELOPMENT
It is ipso facto an existential truism that "human development is furthered not by conformity or destructive criticisms/conflicts but by creative/constructive conflicts". That was why geocentrism paved way for heliocentrism; simple farm tools paved way for sophisticated machines and crude science paved way for multitasking techno-scientific inventions.
However, the rate at which blame game is practiced nowadays calls for a question. What is blame game and what are its psychological cum epistemological implications? What good or bad does it serve humanity in the areas of human development?
It is therefore to address these questions and point out that blame game has done more harm than good to mankind that I write this piece.
The blame game is a Northern Irish comedy panel game hosted by Tim McGarry and characterized by "Pass The Buck" where individual members of the audience ask the contestants who they feel responsible for a topical issue, usually in the structure "Who do you blame for...A, B, C etc? and they contestants continue to shift the blame from one individual to another ad infinitum without a winner.
It is pathetic that people have bought into the blame game rule in our day-to-day activities which it is but an aberration to the ideals for human development and harmonious coexistence of man.
The fundamental error with the blame game is that people excuse themselves for the same negative behavior that they blame others for doing this or that and possibly always find something else to blame. For example, you will see APC led government blaming PDP led government in Nigeria or one politician blaming another politician or student blaming lecturer or citizens blaming leaders or parents blaming children or partners blaming each other or the clergy blaming the congregation vice versa and so on and so forth.
We are inclined to play blame game because of the following viz:
• Defense mechanism: People who indulge in blame do that to preserve their sense of self-esteem by avoiding awareness of their own flaws or failings.
• Attack: People who indulge in blame do that to hurt people's feelings and this is a very destructive conflict resolution method.
• Lack of Empathy: People who indulge in blame are unable to discern the causes of other people's behavior, or even their own. They do not subject themselves to another person's place but are bent in finding fault with others. This is the case where you see people call different kinds of defaming names to others for their wrongs but never makes any effort to rewrite the wrongs for good. As an opportunists they are if you give them such opportunity they will do worse than the person they accuse.
• Irresponsibility: People who indulge in blame find it easier to blame someone else than to accept responsibility. Rather, find it very difficult to accept being responsible for their actions and in-actions; choices and decisions of life. They choose to blame people around them or blame God or whatsoever they can lay hands on for their failures; even for their success.
• Lies: People who indulge in blame find it easier to lie and blame someone else for their mistakes to exonerate themselves from their misdeeds so long as people do not find out and wishes they person they shifted the blame to never finds out.
Now, Do you look for someone else to blame when things appear to have gone wrong? Do you tend to look down on the person you have marked out as the culprit? Do you treat (speak or act toward) this person(s) in a disrespectful manner and think yourself justified? How often? Are you a blame gamer? If so, then what should you do differently for happiness sake? If your answer to these questions is "YES" then, you should know that the blame game has been responsible for mass casualties of war, regrettable acts of road rage, and on a broad interpersonal level (the cause of social, familial and work-related crisis), a considerable amount of human frustration and unhappiness. As such, the blame game consists of blaming another person for an event or state of affairs thought to be undesirable, and persisting in it instead of proactively making changes that ameliorate the situation.
This to a great extent has impede human development, bred distrust and mutual suspicion as it tends to make one stretch out outside him/herself to look for the problem elsewhere instead of finding solutions to problems.
To abate the resultant effect of blame game, we must learn to recast responsibility as a way to learn from your mistakes as well as those of others. Accept your fallibility as a route toward self-improvement.
Conclusion
It is worthwhile that we keep ourselves abreast of the fact that 'the more often you play the blame game, the more you lose'. So, learning to tell when you need to own up to your role in a bad situation will help you grow from your experiences, and ultimately help you achieve more fulfilling relationships. The more you look for who to blame the more things get wrong . If you are a blame gamer please have a rethink and concentrate more on improvement than in blames. We are not perfect though we strive to be better version of ourselves all time.
Ikechukwu Peter Ovuoba a.k.a Onwa Izhi
Monday 29th July, 2019
It is ipso facto an existential truism that "human development is furthered not by conformity or destructive criticisms/conflicts but by creative/constructive conflicts". That was why geocentrism paved way for heliocentrism; simple farm tools paved way for sophisticated machines and crude science paved way for multitasking techno-scientific inventions.
However, the rate at which blame game is practiced nowadays calls for a question. What is blame game and what are its psychological cum epistemological implications? What good or bad does it serve humanity in the areas of human development?
It is therefore to address these questions and point out that blame game has done more harm than good to mankind that I write this piece.
The blame game is a Northern Irish comedy panel game hosted by Tim McGarry and characterized by "Pass The Buck" where individual members of the audience ask the contestants who they feel responsible for a topical issue, usually in the structure "Who do you blame for...A, B, C etc? and they contestants continue to shift the blame from one individual to another ad infinitum without a winner.
It is pathetic that people have bought into the blame game rule in our day-to-day activities which it is but an aberration to the ideals for human development and harmonious coexistence of man.
The fundamental error with the blame game is that people excuse themselves for the same negative behavior that they blame others for doing this or that and possibly always find something else to blame. For example, you will see APC led government blaming PDP led government in Nigeria or one politician blaming another politician or student blaming lecturer or citizens blaming leaders or parents blaming children or partners blaming each other or the clergy blaming the congregation vice versa and so on and so forth.
We are inclined to play blame game because of the following viz:
• Defense mechanism: People who indulge in blame do that to preserve their sense of self-esteem by avoiding awareness of their own flaws or failings.
• Attack: People who indulge in blame do that to hurt people's feelings and this is a very destructive conflict resolution method.
• Lack of Empathy: People who indulge in blame are unable to discern the causes of other people's behavior, or even their own. They do not subject themselves to another person's place but are bent in finding fault with others. This is the case where you see people call different kinds of defaming names to others for their wrongs but never makes any effort to rewrite the wrongs for good. As an opportunists they are if you give them such opportunity they will do worse than the person they accuse.
• Irresponsibility: People who indulge in blame find it easier to blame someone else than to accept responsibility. Rather, find it very difficult to accept being responsible for their actions and in-actions; choices and decisions of life. They choose to blame people around them or blame God or whatsoever they can lay hands on for their failures; even for their success.
• Lies: People who indulge in blame find it easier to lie and blame someone else for their mistakes to exonerate themselves from their misdeeds so long as people do not find out and wishes they person they shifted the blame to never finds out.
Now, Do you look for someone else to blame when things appear to have gone wrong? Do you tend to look down on the person you have marked out as the culprit? Do you treat (speak or act toward) this person(s) in a disrespectful manner and think yourself justified? How often? Are you a blame gamer? If so, then what should you do differently for happiness sake? If your answer to these questions is "YES" then, you should know that the blame game has been responsible for mass casualties of war, regrettable acts of road rage, and on a broad interpersonal level (the cause of social, familial and work-related crisis), a considerable amount of human frustration and unhappiness. As such, the blame game consists of blaming another person for an event or state of affairs thought to be undesirable, and persisting in it instead of proactively making changes that ameliorate the situation.
This to a great extent has impede human development, bred distrust and mutual suspicion as it tends to make one stretch out outside him/herself to look for the problem elsewhere instead of finding solutions to problems.
To abate the resultant effect of blame game, we must learn to recast responsibility as a way to learn from your mistakes as well as those of others. Accept your fallibility as a route toward self-improvement.
Conclusion
It is worthwhile that we keep ourselves abreast of the fact that 'the more often you play the blame game, the more you lose'. So, learning to tell when you need to own up to your role in a bad situation will help you grow from your experiences, and ultimately help you achieve more fulfilling relationships. The more you look for who to blame the more things get wrong . If you are a blame gamer please have a rethink and concentrate more on improvement than in blames. We are not perfect though we strive to be better version of ourselves all time.
Ikechukwu Peter Ovuoba a.k.a Onwa Izhi
Monday 29th July, 2019
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